| To a good friend |
[Feb. 21st, 2008|11:45 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The Frames -- Dream Awake | ] |
Normally I try to keep my affairs classy, but after having to spend the entire DAY and too much money cleaning my car due to it being not only egged, but also oreo-ed, peanut butter-ed, and much more, you know what I say? I say class is not priority.
Manny Santos, your boyfriend and I have a lot of sex... and I mean a lot. We've had sex in his apartment, my apartment, my car, his car, in a public restroom, in a private restroom, and even at Jay's office when I visited him at work. Most of those places were multiple times, of course. Jay told me that I was the most limber girl that he had been with. We even had sex after we left the courthouse when we had our marriage annulled. We don't just get drunk and hook up, either. He's even come over to my apartment in the middle of the day between clients and posed as my boyfriend if he hadn't left by the time they got there. Jay tells me that I'm cute, that I'm hot, sexy... you get the idea. I guess the whole "praying mantis" thing doesn't bother him that much. In fact, one time, we even had sex while your television show was on. It was pretty amazing, too. Even in this last fight that you had, Jay couldn't wait to get in touch with me as soon as he could so that we could get it on.
But I wish the best for you and Jay because you're really, really going to need the well-wishing. Your relationship is a really shitty one. That's why I have no real problem with sleeping with your boyfriend; I know that you will never last. And in fact, in the next fight that you guys have -- oh, probably within the next 3.2 seconds -- I'll be right there on the other end of the phone, ready to fuck him all over again... and pretty much every time after that. You won't be lacking my presence in your world any time soon, Manny Santos.
And by the way, I'm kind of surprised that you wasted all of that junk food on my car. It looks like you put it to pretty good use yourself. |
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